Wikipedia:Peer review/Battle of 42nd Street/archive1

Battle of 42nd Street

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I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to get it to GA, and if possible FA (FA seems like a bit of a stretch considering I have never gotten one before).

Thanks, History6042😊 (Contact me) 01:05, 23 June 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Kimikel

I will be performing a review here within the next few days. Kimikel (talk) 01:22, 12 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry for the delay, I've just gotten time to review this. Here are some initial comments. I will review the bulk of the article and the sources next. Thanks for your patience. Kimikel (talk) 02:08, 15 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]
@Kimikel, Done, thank you. History6042😊 (Contact me) 12:48, 15 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]
@History6042:: I've finished the next section. Sorry for the piecemeal way in which I'm reviewing it but I don't have too much time for Wikipedia. I should finish the next two sections by Saturday. 01:37, 17 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]
No problems with doing the review in pieces, honestly it’s easier for me, thank you. History6042😊 (Contact me) 02:11, 17 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]
@Kimikel. Done. History6042😊 (Contact me) 14:47, 17 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]

@History6042: I am finished with my review. Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns regarding my suggestions. Kimikel (talk) 23:04, 22 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]
@Kimikel, Done, thank you. History6042😊 (Contact me) 15:53, 23 July 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Image, infobox, etc.

Image and associated parameters look good. May want to consider cropping out the label at the bottom. Also needs alt text.
Is there a reason for the bibliography being in the order that it is? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe it should be in alphabetical order.
Full citations for Bassett 1948 and Bell 1991 should both be in the Bibliography section

Lead

I feel the lead sentence could be a little longer, e.g. the FA Battle of the Bismarck Sea: "The Battle of the Bismarck Sea (2–4 March 1943) took place in the South West Pacific Area (SWPA) during World War II when aircraft of the U.S. Fifth Air Force and the Royal Australian Air Force (RAAF) attacked a Japanese convoy carrying troops to Lae, New Guinea." At a minimum, adding the belligerents, and perhaps briefly how/why the battle began, would help contextualize it a good deal more with just a single sentence.
Afterwards the Anzac troops > Afterwards, the Anzac troops

Background

could provide their navy > I would switch to "the Royal Navy" to make the sentence less ambiguous
heavy equipment > what kind of equipment? or does the author only give us "heavy equipment"?
(Oberkommando des Heeres (OKH)) > breaking out the translation and acronym like this seems unnecessary, since the acronym isn't used again in the article
Soviet Union and was > Soviet Union, and was

Opposing forces

Allies

Freyberg > Needs full name and wikilink
CretZe landing strip > perhaps a typo for "Crete"?
No Royal Air Force (RAF) units were based permanently on CretZe landing strip at Rethymno, all on the north coast, were ready and another strip at Pediada-Kastelli was nearly finished. > This whole sentence seems a little unclear and might need to be broken into two.
and the only one with a concrete runway, was at Heraklion > wikilink Heraklion
It was still improvised in nature, with the fuel store located outside the positions defending the airfield for example. > It was still improvised in nature; for example, the fuel store was located outside the airfield's defense positions.
space of a week 27,000> space of a week, 27,000
Greece, many lacking any equipment other than their personal weapons, sometimes not even those. > Greece; many lacked any equipment other than their personal weapons, and some lacked even those.
14,000 this > 14,000, this

Germans

the 12th Army commanded > the 12th Army, commanded
Student who was > Student, who was
Division, and some paratroopers remove comma

Battle

blunt the attack there> blunt the attack [to avoid double use of "there"
however, at Maleme > remove however
south-east of Chania where > south-east of Chania, where
came near to their > approached their
charged the Germans, on their flank attacking with bayonets and small arms, and heavy close quarters fighting ensued > charged the Germans on their flank, attacking with bayonets and small arms; heavy close quarters fighting ensued.
The Maori Battalion also joined in the charge, after performing a haka, followed by the other battalions, and supported by machine guns of the 2/1st Machine Gun Battalion. > After performing a haka, the Maori Battalion also joined the charge, followed by the other battalions and supported by machine guns of the 2/1st Machine Gun Battalion.

Aftermath

That afternoon though,> That afternoon,
mountains trying to encircle the Anzacs > mountains, trying to encircle the Anzacs
withdrew joining the columns retreating south> withdrew, joining the columns retreating south
and although it was planned to evacuate. > although it had planned to be evacuated.
Later, the Germans moved to bring... Multiple comma splices here; this should be at least 3 different sentences

Bibliography

Bassett, James A. needs a bullet point