Talk:Kinneloa Fire/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Nominator: Penitentes (talk · contribs) 17:48, 15 December 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 20:48, 7 January 2025 (UTC)

Hello, I'm GhostRiver. I'll be reviewing this article against the good article criteria. By doing so, I am earning points for the WikiCup and the January 2025 GAN Backlog Drive. Although a quid pro quo review is not necessary, it is appreciated. You can see what open good article nominations I have here.

I will go through the article section by section checking it against the criteria. Once I have finished my review, I will place the article on hold, giving you seven days to respond. If you need more time, just reach out! While I'll always put the article on hold once it's ready for you to look at, you may start making changes before I complete my review. — GhostRiver 20:48, 7 January 2025 (UTC)

Hi @GhostRiver, thanks very much for your review; it's thorough and well-considered. Things have been a little busy lately (I/my family have been affected by the Eaton Fire , which depressingly and ironically burned in almost the exact footprint as the Kinneloa Fire), but I hope to finish addressing your comments by the end of the day tomorrow.

Best, Penitentes (talk) 21:12, 14 January 2025 (UTC)

@GhostRiver I believe that's all the comments so far addressed and/or resolved! Penitentes (talk) 21:50, 15 January 2025 (UTC)

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Infobox and lede

• "October of 1993"

•  Done Someone got to this before me.

• "one of the most destructive wildfires ever in Los Angeles County"

•  Done

• details on fatalities can be confined to the body

•  Done

• the third paragraph should be worked into the body somewhere, probably under the "effects" header

•  Done Moved to "Background" for the time being!

Background

• Per MOS:SEASON, season names like "autumn" and "winter" should be avoided in favor of clear calendar designations

•  Partly done I've replaced In the autumn of 1993 with By October 1993 and over the summer and fall with by October. I don't have a calendar designation handy to replace wet winter in 1992–1993, since that's taken directly from the source article ("the winter's rains brought new growth"). I hope that suffices!

• First sentence should also read "By [time]" rather than "In [time]", as the six years of drought led up to this time frame

•  Done See above.

• Would link the phrase full six years of severe drought to Droughts in California

•  Done

• What kind of "species" are chamize and manzanita? (Being facetious, clarify that they are plants and not beasties)

•  Done Specified they are plant species

• which comprise chaparral: one of the most fire-prone plant communities, containing flammable oils and resins slow to rot or decay → which comprise chapparal, the flammable oils of which and resins slow to rot or decay make it one of the most fire-prone plant communities

•  Done

• Link Santa Ana winds

•  Done

• forecast Santa Ana winds. Santa Ana winds are a regular → forecast Santa Ana winds—a regular

•  Done

• Combine the paragraphs starting "The red flag warnings" and "Studies of historical charcoal records," they're part of the same thought

•  Done

Progression

October 27

• While Huang's homelessness is relevant to the story (as he needed to warm himself while rough sleeping), his schizophrenia does not need to be included in this part, and I cannot find it mentioned in the attached reference

•  Done

• The second sentence can be cut and its information melded into the rest of the paragraph. Something like: The Kinneloa Fire began before dawn on the morning of October 27, 1993, on the slopes of the San Gabriel Mountains above northeastern Altadena. The homeless Andres Huang, 35, was sleeping in a small grove of pine trees adjacent to the Mount Wilson Toll Road (a dirt road typically used by hikers), roughly halfway between Eaton Canyon and Henninger Flats. He woke up feeling cold and built a small fire from pine needles and twigs to warm himself.

•  Done

• Wrong abbreviation for the LACFD when first introduced

•  Done

• It quickly became clear that the incident, quickly dispatched as the Kinneloa Fire, had the potential to become a major incident. Remove the second "quickly"

•  Done

• By 4:45 a.m., the fire was still only three acres. Needs a citation

•  Done

• A lot of the instances of "began to" could be cut: Wind gusts spread the fire rapidly. The fire moved down Eaton Canyon. Arrived on scene to drop water.

•  Done

• engine strike teams (a strike team consists of five engines) → strike teams of five fire engines

•  Done

• and one moved south → and the other moved south

•  Done

• replace parentheticals around "some only 18 feet (5.5 m) wide" with em dashes to avoid double parentheticals

•  Done

• remove parentheticals around for lack of funds

•  Done

• no comma needed after left for the Laguna Fire

•  Done

• to hook up to fire hydrants → to connect to fire hydrants

•  Done

• In the afternoon, the Santa Ana winds subsided. → The Santa Ana winds subsided by the afternoon.

•  Done

October 28–31

• write out "to" in subhead

•  Done

• weaker than the October 27–28 episode, but still concerning to firefighters → though weaker than the October 27–28 episode, the report still concerned firefighters

•  Done

• Can paraphrase the quote from the officer

•  Done

Effects

Casualties

• the Sheriff's Department said → the Sheriff's Department reported

•  Done

• a few ways to rewrite this but it's assumed father and son will share a last name, so only one needs to be included

•  Done

• link flash flood

•  Done

Damage

• One hundred and twenty-one of those structures were houses, and they included → Of these, 121 were houses, including

•  Done

• "Bill Clinton in a speech declared"

•  Done

• commas around "including Los Angeles County" instead of parentheses

•  Done

• you already introduced the acronym FEMA in the last section, so you can shorten Witt's title accordingly

•  Done

• optional: include inflation calculations for the damage amounts

•  Done

• "At the time, the Kinneloa Fire was the twelfth most destructive"

•  Done

• "since fallen well out of the top 20 statewide"

•  Done

• per MOS:CURRENTLY, add a caveat of "as of 2024" for its current place in wildfire destructiveness

•  Done

Post-fire landscape impacts

• see above comment about the use of seasons

•  Partly done Replaced one of the instances here with a reference to the calendar month; the other two are taken from the source so I don't have any other way to specify the timeframe.

• and non-native rye grass (which environmentalists opposed). → and rye grass, the latter of which environmentalists opposed as it was not native to the area.

•  Done

• include conversion from cubic yard to cubic meter

•  Done

Legal proceedings

• first sentence of the second paragraph can be removed, and the first two paragraphs can be combined

•  Done

• clean up Huang's story a bit. something like: Originally a successful local official in China, he became disillusioned by the Chinese Communist Party in the aftermath of the 1989 Tiananmen Square protests and massacre. Huang fled to Peru, leaving his wife and daughter, and worked for an electronics company in Lima. In 1993, he volunteered to establish a U.S. branch of the company and arrived in Los Angeles with a worker's visa.

•  Done

References and links

• Wrap the two bullet points in the "See also" section into one: Station Fire (2009) and Bobcat Fire (2020), subsequent fires in the area

•  Done

General comments

• No stability concerns, nominator is a significant contributor
• Images are properly licensed and relevant to the article
• Copyvio score looks good, only flag is a direct quote
  • See Wikipedia talk:Good article nominations#Innactive reviewer Penitentes. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 17:17, 6 February 2025 (UTC)
    • Given the situation here, and that the review seems to have been properly conducted and completed, I'm closing it now as a GA. Chiswick Chap (talk) 15:28, 8 February 2025 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.